Our doubts are the culprits, and by fearing to try, make us risk the good we sometimes might gain.
A disturbing and convincing voice that keeps you back may be self-doubt. This holds you back from seizing the possibilities. It makes it more difficult to get started or finish things than they need to be.
Sure, it can also be beneficial because it allows you to see your current shortcomings soberly or clearly admit a half-baked or bad idea. But mostly in life, it holds you back.
So how can you get around that how can you resolve those moments of self-doubt so that once again you can move forward?
I’ll explore some tips and practises in this article that have helped me to reduce that damaging inner voice.
1. Just say “No”
Firstly, be quick when your inner doubts bubble up.
Don’t let them spin out of control or evolve from a whisper to a stream of sentences that are discouraging. Speak back to the doubtful part of yourself, instead.
Say or yell something in your head, like No, no, no we’re not going down that road again.
Through doing so you will interrupt the pattern of thinking and avoid the taking over of the inner self-doubt.
2. Look at the past and wallow in your memories.
Be true to yourself and ask yourself the following:
How many times did the negative thing come into existence after I was still taking action when I doubted myself or worried anything might happen?
For me and possibly for you too, the answer is not very much at all.
Self-doubts are most often simply monsters in your brain that can be used by your mind to discourage changes and keep you in the comfort zone.
In spite of these self-doubts, if you look at the past and see how well things have gone several times, then it becomes easier to let go of them or ignore them and concentrate on the most probable optimistic result and take action.
3. Chat about the matter
They can become twisted, exaggerated and not very much in line with fact or rational expectations when you keep your thoughts on the inside.
When it comes to self-doubting feelings, this is very true.
Let them out into the sun, then. Chat about your self-doubts with someone close to you.
It will also help you to hear how exaggerated these feelings have become by only getting them out and speaking them out loud.
And you can get a shift of perspective by talking about those questions with someone who’s positive.
4. Don’t get caught in the pit of contrasts.
If you all too often compare yourself to other people, their accomplishments, and especially their high-light reels they post on social media, then self-doubt will easily creep up.
Comparing yourself against yourself is a better way to go about things. To see exactly how far you’ve come. In order to see what you have overcome.
And to see how you, as a human being have continued to improve, thrive and evolve.
5. Maintain diary.
For several reasons, maintaining a journal may be a helpful practise. When it comes to doubts about yourself, it will enable you to:
Keep your life on a realistic record.
And help you recall the good stuff, the milestones you’ve had, and how you’ve conquered barriers if you’re likely to remember things with a negative slant.
Gain clarification more conveniently.
If you have a problem outlined on paper or in a computer document, it is much easier to relieve worries and concerns and to obtain clarification than if you try to go through it all in your head.
It is easier to find answers and to see the problem in a better and more level-headed way by making lists of pros and cons, going through your thoughts and feelings and similar incidents from the past and writing down various viewpoints on the issue.
6. People don’t care about you
If you worry about what people will think or suggest if you do something then the self-doubt will become stronger easily and you get trapped in fear and in inaction.
When that happens, remind yourself that the reality is that what you do doesn’t really matter to people that much.
They have full hands to think about themselves, their children and animals, work and upcoming sports events, and to worry about what people would think of them.
7. Maybe the issue is of someone else
When you are questioned by others, it’s easy to begin to doubt yourself.
If someone rejects you and you don’t get a second date that you think went pretty well after that first one, then it’s not so strange to get down on yourself.
But what if what he or she said or did is just not at all about you?
Maybe a bad day, month or marriage is your co-worker who verbally lashed out at you.
And because the other person’s mom got sick and he had to concentrate on that or because he reconnected with his ex-girlfriend and decided to give another shot to their relationship, you would not have gotten the second date.
You don’t know anything about another person’s life that’s going on. And around you the universe doesn’t revolve.
So be careful not to misunderstand and generate blame and doubt within yourself without any excuse.
8. Get an inspiration boost.
Let the passion, inspiration and positive hope of someone else spill over to you.
Spend 20 minutes doing that with an audio book, a podcast, or a book. The Tim Ferriss podcast has helped me with this lately, and I have always listened to Brian Tracy’s audio books over the years to get this boost.
This fast 20-minute session will significantly assist you to turn your self-doubts into hope and to think about your challenge constructively.
9. Big achievement comes after a series of losses
Then you can tend to see things through a negative and dark lens when you have a setback. This latest setback may be seen as something that is actually going to be the new standard.
This way of looking at things will trick you into believing that continuing to take action doesn’t make sense.
Remember: It’s not just because you lost that you are a loser.
For someone who takes risks, losses occur. It is merely an aspect of living life entirely.
Things go well sometimes and sometimes they don’t. So don’t make this big thing, or your identity, a disappointment.
Ask yourself: what is one thing from this setback that I can learn?
Using the error or loss to your benefit and step on in a wiser way once again.
10. Stretch up your abilities.
For example, if you always have self-doubt before a presentation in school or at work, then your presentation abilities would be sharpened.
In front of a mirror or in front of a friend, read a few books about it and practise at home. Or to get the expertise or information you need, join Toastmasters.
And in those circumstances, you’ll feel more secure, capable and comfortable.
11. Use word of compassion and empathy
A common way of dealing with self-doubt is to get mad at yourself and your lack of movement. As a way to get yourself to step on, try to beat yourself up.
In my experience, that does not help that much.
I have realised that a better alternative is to be kind and positive when experiencing self-doubt. So I use words of compassion and empathy towards myself but I ask myself as well:
In order to move forward in this case, what is one very small step I can take?
Then I take that very tiny step and continue to move step by step to where I want to go.
12. Celebrate with small win
If you have taken a small move forward in months or years, such as setting up your own website or heading for the first 5 minute sprint, and you’re done with it, then you have a win.
It may be a tiny one, but that’s still a win. Celebrate it therefore.
Get a nice snack or your favourite dinner meal, spend some time on your favourite hobby, or buy something that you’ve wanted for a while now.
This will refresh your drive and recharge it and make it feel more exciting and enjoyable to take action. And it will put aside self-doubts so that you can continue to move and get smaller and larger wins.
13. Don’t plan for each and every step
It can become draining to try and plan every step you can make on a road towards a goal or dream and lead to quite a bit of self-doubt.
And it typically doesn’t work that well anyway, because when faced with reality, the best laid plans always start to fall apart a bit or require some improvement.
So do a bit of rough planning and launch your journey afterwards.
And note that along the way to what you want, you can still course-correct. Encouraged by the new insights, experience and feedback you will get as you move down that path.
14. Prioritise work schedules
To uninstall the self doubt, know how to prioritise work affects the progress of your project, the dedication of your team, and your position as a leader. Every project requires clear objectives. You can rely on technical activities, no matter how well planned, to involve changing orders, re-prioritization and the constant presence of surprises. That’s just the usual order of things.
One of the biggest challenges for project managers and leaders is to specifically prioritise the work that counts on a daily basis. In order to ensure that no one operates on yesterday’s objectives, you have to be cautious and have the correct kind of project insight. It takes a great deal of practise to get this right.